C.S. Lewis wrote that people who simply 'want friends' can never make any. The very condition of having friends is that we should want something else besides friends. Where the truthful answer to the question 'Do you see the same truth?' would be 'I see nothing and I don't care about the truth; I only want a friend,' no friendship can arise--though affection may. There would be nothing for the friendship to be about; and friendship must be about something, even if it were only an enthusiasm for dominoes or white mice.'
Now people can be enthusiastic about white mice and not be friends. The society for the love of white mice might draw many companions. Yet it is within those companions that some people discover something more.
Lewis writes, Friendship arises out of mere Companionship when two or more of the companions discover that they have in common some insight or interest or even taste which the others do not share and which, till that moment, each believed to be his own unique treasure (or burden). The typical expression of opening Friendship would be something like, 'What? You too? I thought I was the only one.'
Watching our team play basketball this year has been about something more than basketball. It has provided a theatre of friendship. No doubt among the parents and fans there have been those moments of What? You too? that Lewis wrote about. And certainly among the team--there has been a bonding of the heart where souls have been knit together like David and Jonathan.
As soon as he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. And Saul took him that day and would not let him return to his father's house. Then Jonathan made a covenant with David, because he loved him as his own soul. And Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that was on him and gave it to David, and his armor, and even his sword and his bow and his belt (I Samuel 18:1-4).
C.S. Lewis quotes are from The Four Loves. Photos are by Sarah Rhodes.
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